Wednesday 29 January 2014

Hello 2014

I didn't realise just how long it had been since I last wrote anything but as they say time flys when your having fun. So it's been four months since I left treatment in Birmingham and returned to the care of my local team, despite some reservations on their ability I'm actually getting on well with my cpn and she is being both helpful and supportive. Life has been a mixed bag of late some good, some bad and some down right challenging.

My weight unfortunately has dropped and prior to christmas there was the threat of another inpatient stay but this time somewhere as far afield as Grimsby! However in true Boo fashion I managed to knuckle down put on a little weight and kept the doors to another hell hole firmly closed. I wish I could say that the threat isn't still looming but I'm fighting to get back to where I was, I've even realised that I prefer the way I both looked and felt at a heavier weight, all I need to do now is quieten the voice in my head that still encourages me to purge, easy then!

That aside life has been ok I'm still working a few hours a week but due to the weight loss haven't been able to increase as yet but at least I'm still out there giving landlords and tenants a hard time! I seem to have mastered the art of socialising thanks to the help of my amazing and supportive friends and now regularly meet up with them and have even managed to eat out in a large group several times, an every day task for most I know but a whopping great mountain was climbed for me.

My best friend sadly split from his fiancée and so we have been seeking solace in each other's company wallowing at times over our losses and sinking in a pit of self blame but for the most laughing at life and the crap it's thrown us getting out and having some well deserved fun. It's fair to say he has and continues to be my rock and I love him to the moon and back.

So that brings me nicely on to the subject of Ben, hmmmmm what can I say on that? Well the divorce is progressing and he has now moved in to a house with his girlfriend leaving our house on the market for sale. I still have days when I could cry for England over my loss and miss him desperately but most of the time I reflect on our time together and realise things were not all they seemed and that I'm not solely to blame for the situation were now in, other days Im so angry I could smash his face in better hope when I see him Friday to sort our joint stuff out I'm not having one of those days! As for his new girlfriend well despite the fact that she was living in my house and sleeping in my bed with my husband (ok we were split but you get the point!) I still managed when I walked in on her casually sitting in bed not to drag her out of the house by her hair and beat her to a pulp, even I'm amazed at the restraint I've shown but then neither of them are worth a criminal record!

Well that's a short snippet of the last few months I would have mentioned the persessive stalker I acquired in the interests of time I'll leave that for my next post.